Ten days ago I came under attack from angry, hateful, bitter, vicious women in Dickinson, North Dakota.  But thankfully, not from any of the women on my “List Of Attractive Women In Dickinson, North Dakota”.

You see, the women on this list must meet certain requirements of attractiveness which include appearance, demeanor, bearing, dress, civility, and respectability.  Do you know, that in the over three years since publishing this list, I have never once had to remove a member from this list, or even issue a warning?

For reference, here is this list https://dickinson58601.com/2016/11/16/list-of-attractive-women-in-dickinson-north-dakota/  .  More than a year ago, I ran out of women in Dickinson to include on this list, because no one else met the minimum requirements.

Since coming under attack by the unattractive women in Dickinson ten days ago, I thought about how I might improve Dickinson and the women in Dickinson.  Part of the problem is that there are no standards, nor is there any enforcement of standards.  The women just do whatever they want, like savages, or wild animals.

What I have come up with, is the creation of the Citizen’s Community Police in Dickinson.  This organization will engage in the implementation and enforcement of standards and rules for women in Dickinson.  Just like it is the job of the Police in Dickinson to detect and deter crime, the job of the Citizen’s Community Police in Dickinson will be to detect and deter bad behavior by women.

Beginning now, the citizens of Dickinson can report bad behavior by individual women, a file will be created, the information will be recorded, an investigation will be conducted, and citations or arrest will follow as appropriate.

Citizens of Dickinson are asked to keep an eye open for suspicious or inappropriate behavior by women, and report it.  Here are some examples:

• Driving too fast.
• Texting while driving.
• Leering and Sneering.
• Causing problems.
• Being a problem.
• Causing trouble.
• Wearing pajama pants outside the house.
• Not getting dressed in the morning.
• Talking like someone from the ghetto in a city.
• Wearing leggings outside the house.
• Not keeping house.
• Causing trouble on Facebook.
• Disrespecting their husband.
• Disrespecting their boyfriend.
• Disrespecting their parents.
• Monkey branching.
• Acting stupid.
• Being rude.
• Using bad language.
• Excessive arguing.
• Excessive complaining.
• Not following instructions.
• Bad check writing.
• Using drugs.
• Stealing.
• Handling stolen goods.
• Making false allegations.
• Arriving late for work or appointments.
• Not showing up for work or appointments.
• Cutting their hair too short.
• Coloring their hair an unnatural color.
• Getting tattoos.
• Growing dreadlocks.
• Littering.
• Being jail bait.
• Bad hygiene.
• Taking inappropriate selfies.
• Not washing hands.
• Sticking fingers in mouth in public.
• Interfering with men’s weight training areas.
• Being contentious.
• Causing other people to have to do their job.

Once reports are received, and a file is created, a.k.a. “their jacket”, women will be assessed an ongoing demerit point total, which will result, in order of severity:  verbal warning, written warning, written citation, arrest, incarceration.

Following arrest or incarceration, women will be required to complete both community service and receive counseling as appropriate on topics such as “health”, “hygiene”, “home economics”, “manners”, “the proper care and feeding of husbands”, “how to find and keep a husband”, and so forth.

Women’s files or “their jackets”, will be kept confidential except for sharing with Law Enforcement, The Courts, Husbands, Fiancees, Boyfriends, Parents, Pastors, The Mormon Church, Colleges, Universities, Banks, Car Dealers, Employers, and Landlords.