Tag Archives: Elfin women

Guide To Elfin Women

In my previous blog post, I wrote about seeing an Elfin woman on Wednesday, and two young Elfin women on Thursday in Watford City. This hardly ever happens, anywhere. However, there were contributing factors to this, it is warmer, the ground is thawing out, many many oil field workers have left the area and it is safer for them to come out, and I think that the Elfin women like Taco Johns.

I thought that I would write a brief Guide To Elfin Women.

Elfin women are not really the same species as humans. However, you can get them pregnant. If you do, they will be very upset, and blame you for it entirely, and there is no telling what else they will do.

You are likely to see only one or two Elfin women in a year. If you happen to find out, or see where an Elfin woman lives, it is bad luck. You are unlikely to ever see one working, because they don’t usually have jobs.

If you do know where an Elfin woman is, you can place an unopened bag of either Hershey’s Kisses or an unopened bag of Hershey’s miniature candy bars in front of her, and say, “Here.”, look at her, and walk away. She will examine the bag, and decide if she would like to eat one later. She may throw the bag away without opening it, but that is O.K., she knows that you like her. Don’t try to give an Elfin woman anything else, other than the two specific items that I just described, or it will upset them. You have to wait at least six weeks before you can give them chocolate again, or it will upset them.

You can send an Elfin woman a card, or write her a letter, but don’t send more than three per month, or it will upset them. You can say once that you like them in each card or letter, but don’t say that you love them. In a letter, it is best to write about your involvement or relationships with other creatures. For instance, you could write that you like to play banjo for fish in a pond, or write that you are teaching your cat to ride a bike. Don’t write about harming animals or people, so don’t write about hunting, fishing, or sports. They will not write you back, acknowledge that they received any of your letters, and they may not read your letters, but it counts in their mind that you took the time to write to them.

Elfin women don’t date anyone. They see you coming way before you see them, and they can disappear, so the fact that they are even still present when you arrive where you think they might be, is an indication that they like you. To them, not hiding from you, is what you might think of as a date.

Elfin women are averse to typical human relationships. They do not want to have children, they do not want to work, they do not like to work, they do not want to be on a schedule, they do not like to be asked a lot of questions, they do not like to be bothered. They do like some of the physical characteristics of men. They like men that are handsome or cute, who make things or build things that they like.

If an Elfin woman trusts you more and more, she may go places with you. Like human women, they like to go places that have nice big clean bathrooms, and tile. They like to ride in big trucks, fast cars, luxury cars, good looking cars, but not beater cars or ugly cars.

Elfin women do not like to be kissed or handled in public. If they have gotten to the point where they trust you, when no one is around, you can hold on to their pants belt loop and kiss them, but you have to have a hold of them before you try to kiss them because they will try to get away.

Elfin Women In Watford City, North Dakota

As you may know, Elfin women are prettier than human women. I saw one on Wednesday, and two on Thursday of last week in Watford City. Both times I was going to Taco Johns to get something to eat.

I have been sick for three weeks now in Watford City, and I think that the ground that I am working on has something wrong with it, like it is cursed, or poisonous. It has aged me about three more years in the past three weeks. I don’t feel well at all, and I don’t have any energy, and I don’t feel like mating.

Just like if you are looking for bigfoot, you won’t see one, if you are looking for Elfin women, you won’t see one. It is only when you aren’t thinking about it at all, and it is the furthest thing from your mind that you will see one. This is how it was when I met Miss North Dakota, which I wrote about in a previous blog post. Also, they see you way before you see them, and they can hide before you ever see them, if they want to.

On Wednesday, I parked my truck in the parking lot of Taco Johns, locked my door, turned around, and there one was!, right in the passenger seat of the truck beside me, not two feet away! She looked exactly like the Elfin Princess Liv Tyler, long dark hair, pale white skin, bright eyes. She looked at me just like some tree frog on a branch, and didn’t try to get away. She was barefoot, and had her feet up on the dash, just like you would expect an Elfin woman to do, can’t sit in the front seat of a truck like a human woman.

Not knowing what to do, I went into Taco Johns, and ordered food to go. I thought about it for a few minutes, and still could not figure out what to do. It’s like trying to catch a snake, if you aren’t 100% sure what you are doing, you better just leave it alone. The truck she was in was much nicer than mine. It had a Canadian license plate. She was still there when I went to get in my truck, and she didn’t look at me, which hurt my feelings. But it was because her boyfriend was only a few steps from getting in her truck, and she didn’t want me trying to propose to her right then, and getting into a fight. Like I said, they see you way before you see them.

On Thursday, I went to Taco Johns, I still wasn’t feeling well. When I opened the door and walked in, there were two blonde Elfin girls sitting at a table with some not completely grown high school boys. It is not uncommon for Elfin girls and Elfin women to go places with not completely grown boys. This is because they are safe from the boys they are with, and they are safe from strangers.

The two Elfin girls saw me way before I saw them, and again they were bright eyed and looking at me like tree frogs, with a tree frog smile. After I ordered my food, I looked at them through the window in the partition wall. Like fish in an aquarium sometimes do, they looked back at me. After I got my food, I looked at them as I was leaving, I would have liked to have looked at them longer, but it would have upset the boys, not them.

An older man once told me, “When you have a beautiful woman, and you lose her, you feel bad about it, like you’re never going to find another one. But, you turn over another rock, and look!, there’s another one!”