This blog post is a furtherance of the discussion from yesterday’s blog post.
About eight years ago, I read the results of a study that was conducted by a University. The University recruited somewhere between 400 to 1,000 women to participate in a research study. Each woman was scheduled to come to the University three to five times per month for an approximately 1/2 hour to 1 hour session where she would be shown photographs of men, one at a time, in a private room. For each photograph that she was shown, she was required to click the response for very unattractive, somewhat unattractive, attractive, or very attractive.
The researchers had hundreds of photographs of men. The researchers had purposely chosen these photographs of men, in order to be able to categorize them as showing a man that was very feminine, somewhat feminine, masculine, or very masculine.
The qualities of men that were counted as masculine were, strong prominent jaw, strong prominent brow, large physical build, being muscular, and having facial hair. The qualities of men that were counted as feminine were, soft feminine faces, slight physical build, absence of musculature, and smooth complexions with no facial hair.
After several months of conducting the research study and collecting data, the researchers found a surprising correlation, though it made sense, and could be explained.
For each individual woman, there was an odd thing that was happening. For three weeks in a row, in each weekly session of viewing photographs of men, each individual woman would consistently choose the same type of man as being attractive. However, on the fourth week, each individual woman would sway towards finding the most masculine men as being attractive.
What the researchers found, was that during the point in each woman’s menstrual cycle when she was able to conceive, approximately a one week period each month, she would rate the most masculine men as being attractive to her.
What was at first a little puzzling to the researchers, was if women found the most masculine men as being attractive when they were able to conceive, why didn’t women select the most masculine men as being attractive all month long? One way to put it is, women didn’t want to deal with the most masculine men when they weren’t able to conceive, or were already pregnant. And, that women looked at the more feminine men as easier to get along with.
What this means is, the person that a woman wants to father her children, is not necessarily the person that she wants to be married to. Women want their children to be fathered by the biggest, strongest, most dominant male, in order for her child to have his genes and be successful. However, women look at less masculine men as being easier to live with.
This is one reason why, though not the only reason why, I made the statement, “What women say they want, and what they actually want, are often two different things.”
I will give a couple of real life examples to illustrate what I have described above. Number One:
A man that I worked for who had been the vice-president of a large insurance company, his daughter’s best friend got married when she was thirty-four years old. She was a school teacher. Prior to getting married, she and her fiancee who was thirty-six years old, discussed the subject of having children. Her fiancee said that he did not want to have children, he thought that he was past the age of having children, was that O.K. with her? She agreed with that, she said that she thought that she was past the age of having children. They were in agreement, supposedly, that they did not want to have children.
The two of them were married. About six to eight months after they were married, the wife said, “Guess what…I’m pregnant!” The husband replied, “Guess what…I had a vasectomy!”
No, this was not the case of her husband’s vasectomy not working, this was the case of the wife getting pregnant by another man. The husband had never told his wife that he had had a vasectomy, because he was sure that he didn’t want to have children, he could no longer have children, and his wife had said that she did not want to have children, so he didn’t bring it up.
Here is real life example Number Two:
There was an electrician that I knew who was in poor health, he was about 62 years old. He was living with his second wife who was approximately 52 years old. He and his second wife had been married for approximately ten years, and during their marriage his two daughters from his first marriage were kind of nasty to his wife.
Now that he was sick, his two daughters from his first marriage who were in their thirties, were somewhat more involved in his life because they were concerned about him. The more frequent contact that they were having with their father, they took the opportunity to be mean to his second wife. I felt sorry for his second wife, she was very long suffering and tired, she was having to care for her husband, and his two daughters in their thirties were attacking her like coyotes or hyenas.
One of his daughters was having health problems of her own. After many medical tests, it was determined that she had this specific genetically passed on disease, that only gets passed on when both the mother and the father have it too. The daughter insisted that this must be partly what is wrong with her father, he has to have this disease too. He got tested…he didn’t have it…he was not her father!
He explained to his second wife, “My first wife was caught having an affair. I said to her that we are not going to get a divorce, we are going to move several states away, and this is going to be the end of it. When my daughter was born, I believed that she was possibly not my daughter, but I didn’t say a word about it. When my first wife began cheating again, that is when we got a divorce.”
Here is real life example Number Three:
I was at a nightclub in Florida shortly after I had graduated from college. There was a table with four women, who were all pretty good looking. I went over to them and was complimentary and forward with them, which they liked. It turned out that three of them were lesbians and one of them was not. The one of them that was not a lesbian, was going as a Christian missionary to South America in the morning. I spent until the early a.m. the next day with these women.
On the following weekend, I spent time with these lesbian women again, and I met more of their lesbian girl friends. A weekend or two later, I went to a lesbian bar with these women, I said lesbian bar, not gay bar. One of the strange things in life, is that the hottest most perfectly formed women you will ever meet, are lesbians.
This one lesbian couple that I had been around for several weekends, one of the women was a female motorcycle cop, and her girlfriend was Hispanic and a model. I was at a party, and this Hispanic model was being very affectionate with me, she said, “My girlfriend is out of town, and sometimes I like to be with a man.”
Now pay attention, some women, and this woman in particular, are in a relationship with another woman. For some reason, some women like being physically, romantically, and emotionally involved with another woman, and they just don’t care very much for men. However, I suppose that this Hispanic model, when it got to be the time of the month when she was able to conceive, she found males to be attractive.
Maybe the most valuable and useful take away from this blog post, is that if you are interested in a lesbian, or some other woman who doesn’t like you, you just need to become acquainted, be observant, and wait, they may change their mind at any moment about who they like.