Like most men, I like to ponder who I would include in my harem, if I had a harem. In Dickinson, I already have a good pool of candidates to choose from that are written down in one of my previous blog posts titled, “List Of Attractive Women In Dickinson, North Dakota”.
In order to not be offensive and insulting to the married women over 40 years old on my “List Of Attractive Women In Dickinson, North Dakota”, these women are excused from being in my fantasy harem. Also, in order to not embarrass the women on my list of attractive women, and to not anger their husbands, I will only use these women’s first names in this blog post.
Kaycee is excused because I think that she would be too upset and could not handle being in my harem. Tracy is excused because she recently moved to Montana. Melissa is excused because of her job. I haven’t decided whether or not to include Jessica, I don’t want Jessica to be stuck in the middle of what I am about to describe below.
My harem would include Jessie, Marinna, Codi, and Kit. I have thought about it and thought about it, and I always have the same problem. Jessie and Marinna would be in an alliance against Codi and Kit, for the following reasons:
Jessie and Marinna are very practical. When it is their turn to go to the grocery store, which they do together, they buy about two or three full shopping carts of food. They even use coupons and look for what is on sale. They buy many cartons of eggs, many gallons of milk, big sacks of beans, big sacks of rice, big sacks of potatoes, boxes of pasta, whole chickens, roasts, pork chops, and sausage. They actually have in their heads, what meals they are going to cook, and how long this food will last.
Codi and Kit on the other hand, when they go to the store together, the whole household becomes tense even before they get back from the store because everyone knows what is going to happen. They are going to come back from the store with boxes and boxes of cereal, Captain Crunch, Lucky Charms, Cocoa Puffs, Frosted Flakes, Raisin Bran, Frosted Mini Wheats, Grape Nuts, and Cheerios. Maybe some boxes of frozen waffles, maybe some chicken breasts.
This makes Jessie and Marinna become enraged, because not only do they feel that Codi and Kit wasted a lot of money on buying overpriced cereal, but they see this as an attempt by Codi and Kit to get out of cooking, by not buying anything that requires cooking. What are we supposed to do, eat cereal every day for two weeks?
When Codi and Kit get home and put the boxes of cereal on the counter, they each open separate boxes of cereal, they each fix themselves a bowl of cereal, and they sit down and eat, acting like nothing is wrong, even though Jessie and Marinna are getting ready to kill them.
Jessie and Marinna begin to say, “Well it looks like you two aren’t planning on doing any cooking for a while. And since you probably don’t plan on doing any cleaning either, your know what that leaves? Yeah, you know what that leaves!”
Codi and Kit act like they are unconcerned, but they actually start to lose their appetite and wish that they had done a better job shopping. Later, Codi and Kit start trying to clean the house, but Jessie and Marinna just say, “Too late, too late, it won’t do you any good, too late!”
This is about as far as I ever get fantasizing about my harem because there is so much conflict and fighting.