What Should I Do About Mormon Women?

A day or so ago, I received a “Like” about one of my recent blog posts.  I received a picture of the young woman who “Liked” my blog post.  She was very, very beautiful, and I knew right away that she was probably Mormon.  Then I read that she lived in Salt Lake City, Utah.

When I first moved to Idaho in 2007, I started seeing young women that were unbelievably beautiful.  I also found out that the area that I had moved to was about 70% Mormon.  I thought that this was good.

I was in my late thirties then.  I had gotten into the habit of hardly ever drinking alcohol.  I never had had an interest in drugs.  I thought that it was great that I had moved to an area where husbands and wives stayed together, didn’t drink, didn’t use drugs, had children, and focused on their families.  This seemed like a good place for me to be in.

At first in Idaho, even when I had not shaved for a day and was wearing old jeans and a T-shirt, young Mormon women would smile at me very friendly and say hello to me, without any fear or hesitation.  I was timid towards them because I was new to the area, I didn’t know what to think, or what was going on.  Sometimes their beauty was overwhelming.  I would encounter friendly Mormon women at most public places like restaurants, stores, the post office, etcetera.

When I say that their beauty was overwhelming sometimes, I mean it, it was.  To describe it, imagine perfectly beautiful hair, facial features, eyes, nose, lips, teeth, ears, chin, neck, shoulders, arms, body, legs, everything perfectly formed and flawless, and, combine this with them being friendly, without any hesitation, reservation, or fear.  They were angel-like in a way, only more attractive.

You readers may think that I am embellishing and over exaggerating, but the impression of beauty was even stronger than I can re-tell it now, especially when you are not expecting it, and merely doing errands.  I want to describe that it was not a feeling of lust or sexual attraction towards these women when you unexpectedly meet them briefly and they are so polite, I was just stunned, overwhelmed.  They could tell that they caught me off guard and surprised me.

I wanted to know and find out what was going on.  Why were these Mormon women so different?  I eventually pieced together, that on both sides of their families, both sets of grandparents did not use alcohol, coffee, tea, tobacco, drugs, sugar, unhealthy food, or junk food, neither did both of their parents.  Both sets of grandparents, both parents, and all of their children did not do anything unhealthy or over indulge in anything.  These beautiful young Mormon women were just very, very healthy, and they grew up in loving, caring, nurturing families.  That is why I had never seen women like this before, most people elsewhere did not live like this.

In a way I wanted one of these beautiful Mormon women, and in a way I did not.  I felt that they were too good for me.  Even if I could get one, they would quickly become disappointed in me.  How could I support one of them?  They probably cost a lot of money.

I wanted to get a good job in Idaho, partly because I wanted to be able to date and afford one of these Mormon women.  Even though I had a B.S. in engineering, and had worked as an engineer, estimator, superintendent, project manager, and inspector, I found that I was getting very little response to my job applications.  As I lived in Idaho for several months, I began to see that there were two classes of people, the Mormons and the non-Mormons.

The Mormons were very optimistic and positive when I met them, however they all had good jobs, or the reasonable expectation of getting a good job.  The non-Mormons were not as happy or optimistic, and the non-Mormons did not have as good a job, or they had no job at all.

For example, I applied to two specialty construction companies for estimator and superintendent, doing work that I had done before for years.  I found that the people working for these two specialty construction companies as estimator, superintendent, or project manager were recent college graduates with degrees in English, and they had far less work experience than me.  Though I had a degree in engineering, and I had many more years of work experience in construction, I was not hired, and people with recent college degrees in English from Brigham Young University were hired.

This was the first time in my life that I had seen such blatant discrimination, or had been discriminated against.  It was kind of sickening and repulsive, the unfairness and injustice of hiring Mormons over everyone else, disregarding qualifications and work experience.  I supposed, that if Mormons would rather hire Mormons than non-Mormons, this is what happens.

After living in Idaho for more months, and accepting a low paying shitty job at a Mormon owned business, I did not have such a good opinion of Mormons then.  I started to learn a little about the dark side of Mormons and Mormonism.

Before I had lived in Idaho for a year, I began doing self employed construction work with a man about my age from Georgia.  This man from Georgia had grown up going to Southern Baptist churches.  When two Mormon missionaries came knocking at his door, he invited them in to discuss religion.  Part of why he let them in, was to find out what Mormonism was about, and partly it was for entertainment.

The two Mormon missionaries were nice, so I said to my friend from Georgia, that I would go to Mormon church if he would go.  My friend was eager to go.  Here is what it was like:

When you go to Mormon church, you go to your “Ward” that you are assigned according to where you live.  You may not attend another “Ward”, you must go to the one which you are assigned.  All of your personal church records, which are numerous, are transferred to this Ward.

At the opening meeting in the Ward, which goes from about 9:00 a.m. to 10:00 a.m., the Bishop of the Ward, who is a lay person, conducts the general meeting, with both men and women in attendance.  Then, men and women go to different study groups, according to if they are male or female, and according to their age.  I asked the two Mormon missionaries later, where were all the good looking young Mormon women, and they replied that the unmarried young men and women go to a separate church service at a different time.

At one of the men’s study groups which I attended, where the men read from the Book of Mormon, and the book of Doctrines and Covenants, a man read, “…and just as God evolved, we too can evolve to become like God, and become gods of our own planet one day.”

That was it for me, when they read, “…just as God evolved, we too can evolve to become like God, and become gods of our own planet one day.”  I had never heard anything so bizarre in my entire life, and they weren’t kidding.  This was blasphemous in three different ways, implying that God was imperfect, that man could evolve to become like God, and eventually be god of his own planet.  I could not believe that the Mormon church could teach this, and people not know that this is what they teach.

I told the two Mormon missionaries that I could not go to the Mormon church anymore.  For me personally, even on days when you don’t know if there is a God, or if you doubt the existence of God, it would be going way too far to agree with the blasphemy that you think you will evolve to become like God and be god of your own planet one day.

I had more years in Idaho to observe and consider what was going on.  I wondered, did the Mormon medical doctors and Mormon lawyers who were highly educated and supposed to be logical thinkers, did they believe that they were going to be god of their own planet one day?  Some psychiatrists, would consider this belief to be irrational, delusions of grandeur, and an indication of mental illness.  How did these highly educated people reconcile all of this in their minds?

Something else that bothered me, was how do Mormon women put up with this?  The Mormon religion teaches that men can evolve to become like God, and become god of their own planet one day, but it doesn’t say this for women.  The opinion and teaching about the role of women in Mormonism varies, but it is primarily that the role of women is to serve men, and that they are inferior to men.  Regardless of the specifics about what the Book of Mormon and Doctrines and Covenants says about women, they are treated as inferior.

What should I do about this?  I have seen the young Mormon women that are so beautiful and friendly, why would I want to wreck this?  These young women that are so beautiful, healthy, friendly, and willing to be subservient, why would I want to change this?

I wonder what goes on in these Mormon women’s minds, especially the ones that go to college and get a bachelors degree, masters degree, and doctorate degree.  At what point does this stop making sense to them?  At what point do they see that this is a limiting life for them?

Is this a choice for Mormon women where they must decide, “Do I want a good looking successful husband, a nice large home, nice automobile, social status, healthy good looking children, the love of my parents?  Or, do I want to be free, independent, not be held back, and be poor, lonely, and alone?”

Is this a compromise for Mormon women, where her future husband confides, “I don’t believe this, you don’t believe this, but in order to please my parents, please your parents, to get ahead, and to be successful, let’s just pretend that we believe this.”

I feel bad for Mormon women.  I don’t want them to be taken advantage of their whole life.  I don’t want them to go through life thinking that their husband is going to evolve to be like God, and they are just lucky to serve him.

Now that I am thinking about this, and writing about this, the reality is, there probably aren’t any Mormon women over 40 years old who think that their husband is going to evolve to become like God.  The Mormon women over 40 years old, probably believe, think, and feel the same as any other women, and asses their situation the same as any other women would.  I don’t have to tell them anything, I wouldn’t be telling them anything that they didn’t already know.

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One thought on “What Should I Do About Mormon Women?

  1. Well, considering that the doctrine actually teaches that men and women will become gods and goddesses, and that the man cannot be a god unless he has a goddess for a wife; and considering that the doctrine does not teach that women are inferior, but simply different; and considering that nothing about the doctrine holds women back in any way, I would say that they are fine with everything and understand it very well.

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