How Hard Should You Bite A Woman’s Ass

Since I seem to be focusing on women this week, I will continue on with this same theme and answer the question, “How Hard Should You Bite A Woman’s Ass?”

Women want attention and they want to be appreciated, so one of the ways that you can show both your interest and appreciation is to bite them on their ass.  This can be done when they are wearing pants, underwear, or no clothing at all.  However, in order to be sincere and arouse any kind of emotion in women, it must be done hard enough.

How hard you should bite depends on a woman’s age.  Follow the guidelines given below, and you can’t go wrong.  Except remember that we are talking about biting women on their ass, and not any other place, as this would be too hard elsewhere.  Also note the exception given at the end of this article regarding Mormon women and Asian women.

Women in their teens:  You should bite their ass increasingly hard until they say, “Ooowwww!”, but not beyond that, let go.

Women in their college age years, 18-23:  You should bite their ass increasingly hard until they say, “Ooowww, shit, that hurts!”, but not beyond that, let go.

Women aged 24-30:  You should bite their ass increasingly hard until they say, “Ooowww, shit, that hurts, what the fuck is wrong with you!”, but not beyond that, let go.

Women aged 31-40:  You should bite their ass increasingly hard until they say, “Ooowww, shit, that hurts, what the fuck is wrong with you, are you crazy!”, but not beyond that, let go.

Women aged 41-50:  You should bite their ass increasingly hard until they say, “Ooowww, shit, that hurts, what the fuck is wrong with your, are you crazy, don’t ever do anything like that again, I mean it!”, but not beyond that, let go.

Now, before any older women get too upset, it’s not like you are going to get bit that much harder than anyone else when you are over 40 years old, it’s that you are going to have less tolerance for it and start squealing sooner, louder, and longer to stop.

*Note:  Because Mormon women and Asian women are raised in a culture where they are taught not to complain, you could accidentally do some physical harm to Mormon and Asian women before they would complain about you biting too hard.  Or, Asian women might be complaining for you to stop but you don’t know what they are saying.

Now that I think about it, biting a woman on the ass is like writing a blog post article, you really aren’t getting their attention until they start saying, “What the fuck is wrong with you, are you crazy!”

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